I don’t think anyone would disagree that Jesus was an extrovert—an outgoing expressive person. Always among the crowds—always followed, speaking, and feeding. But I bet his extroversion was misperceived, at times.
If we utilize today’s definition of introvert, Jesus would have been perceived as one because of his frequent need to withdraw to desolate places to be alone (Mt. 14:13; Mk. 1:35, 6:31; Lk. 4:42, 5:16). Often, Jesus walked away from the crowds, or downright blasted the religious elite.
Extroverts are perceived as happy, outgoing, and energetic people. So, why did Jesus remove himself?
More than likely, Jesus found his strength, discernment, clarity, rest, and rejuvenation during his alone times. If he took the gifting and profile tests we currently endure, he might be labeled as an introvert. In fact, some would say that because Jesus found “recharging” via isolation that he would be the true definition of an introverted person (i.e. demanding seclusion).
But, Jesus’ moments and need for withdrawal to be alone should not define him as an introvert (or an Extrovert-Introvert). There’s an interesting dynamic within apostolic leadership that I’ve observed (among my own behaviors)—along with naturally extroverted people.
Here’s two observations.
Extroversion Demands Introversion
Jesus directed the Apostles to “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while” (Mk. 6:31). Naturally, we all need rest. Without rest, burnout is sure to come. The extrovert is no exception to the rule—they are indeed, the needfor the rule.
But with naturally outgoing people—true extroversion—their daily draw to be around people and interact is where they thrive. It’s their “ignition zone” and fire for living.
For the apostolically gifted extrovert, they are such thriving, energetic, and network-driven people that they will find themselves recharging—not in the crowds, but in seclusion. For this reason, they must be aware of utilizing seclusion as a spiritual discipline.
For the naturally extroverted person that engages people and groups daily, filling their schedules with meetings, gatherings, and socials, they will need to unplug and morph into a hermit—perhaps an hour or so, each day. This hermitage is a necessity to prevent burnout and keep the joy of living within community, strong.
But, on the other end, if you place an extrovert in isolation for too long—depression will sit in. While extroverts demand introversion for recharging, they must be aware of what may be causing the need for the introversion. Is it hard-work, crowds, or something else?
Why Extroverts may be Perceived as Introverts
—The “something else.”
One of my observations of extroverted crowd loving people—is that they may not “like” everyone in those crowds (think Jesus and the Pharisees/Sadducees). For the extrovert, judgmental and negative people turn them off—quickly—and in like manner, they may receive the extrovert’s “off-switch.” To silence an outgoing, naturally communicative person—may not be a good thing.
Because extroverts need interacting, conversing, and living among people, they tend to pick up rather quickly on human behaviors and negative people. Basically, they can see through fake people in an instant. As a result, extroverts will tend to immediately withdraw from negativism.
The extrovert’s withdraw may be perceived as introversion— (i.e. “they always want to be alone when I see them; they never want to gather with us.”). Extroverts thrive off of positive feedback.
What’s the Answer?
As a naturally gifted (apostolic) extrovert, I have realized that people will seriously misperceive my behaviors. To some, I will seem way too outgoing—usually the ones that see me working within my daily giftedness. I’ve had people tell me that I “wear my heart on my sleeve.”
But to others—those who see me in my off-time or around negative people—they may perceive me to be a recluse. When you’re off, all that you want to do is be alone. Or, why don’t you talk with such and such people? I realize that I shut out negativity—indeed—it’s a hard door slam!
So, what’s the answer?
We have to learn to cultivate our natural gifting. I’ve learned to give my time to where it is most utilized and most needed. As well, I’ve learned that if I do not have those times of “desolate” recharging that my life is off-kilter. And, if I’m surrounded by prolonged negativity it squashes my innovative, outward, and outgoing personality.
I’ve learned to be “slow to speak and quick to listen” (James 1:19). And so, I’ve learned to navigate the daily rhythms of life, with Jesus.
“Pastor, I need to speak with you a moment.” Of course—this is usually right before service.
“I’m just feeling like God is leading us to another church—something that offers much more.”
I’ve heard this “revelation” before, but I’ve come to an understanding. They’ll return at some point for pastoral care. That’s not an arrogant or boastful statement, but an observation made from time.
All the bells, but no whistles
I’ve seen church members go to larger congregations with thousands. They love the feel of vibrant worship, gads of opportunities for their children, and the overall mega-environment.
Who can disagree—the church I pastor doesn’t have a coffee shop?
Don’t get me wrong, I wish we did! And, I’m not a disgruntled small church pastor. I love Christ’s church—big or small. And some of my pastor friends of larger congregations get this—not everyone will want to “plug-in.”
I think, for the most part, small church people move to large churches in search of the bells and whistles. However, they don’t understand the small group concepts of missional living. The result is they’re left with some bells, but no whistles.
When major life tragedies occur—a death in the family, hospital visitation, prayer covering, spousal failure or infidelity, or a traumatic family addiction—there’s no pastoral care and support. There may be vibrant worship in the larger church they’re attending, but there’s no “perceived” fruitful care.
A bell and a pomegranate
The priest would come before the Lord on behalf of the people—and upon the hem of his robe were “a golden bell and a pomegranate, a golden bell and a pomegranate” (Exodus 28:34). I’ve always thought this was a fascinating verse.
I’ve often wondered, why a bell and a pomegranate? In my humble opinion, I believe there must be evidential worship and fruitful nourishment—both—not one, or the other.
The emblematic bell and pomegranate—like modern day emojis—expressed to Israel how the Lord’s “kingdom of priests” were to serve. It is imperative for God’s people to have outwardly expressed lives of worship and nourishing soul care.
When a believer leaves a small church for a much larger one—not understanding the missional DNA of small group—they may perceive that “pastoral care” will be like the small church. Hence, in due time, the believer will return to the small church for pastoral “pomegranate support.”
Can we be frank?
I don’t enjoy church bashing—that’s not me. Big church or small church—God should be glorified. But the reality and perceptions of pastoral care in the two entities are vastly different. The larger church pastor is more administrative than soul care. He may be available for tragedies, but rarely for visitation, counseling, or hospital care.
The larger the church, the more difficult it is to “tend the flock.”
Regardless, I have witnessed believers return to the small church after age, sickness, or tragedy occurs—they’re seeking pastoral care that they presumed would be available.
The only way for larger churches to provide the bells and pomegranates are communal groups. Yet, the majority of the transfer growth that “exoduses” the small church will not engage life groups. The statistic is true: Only 20 percent of Christian adults are involved in any form of discipleship activity.
However, I also fear that “transfer growth” Christians, pursuing larger churches, are more likely seeking to slip-in-and-out unnoticed and prefer it that way. Until calamity strikes.
I don’t know of a formidable solution—maybe you have one?
But, here’s what I do know. When a member leaves for a larger church, the small church pastor feels neglected, hurt, and deserted. While they may understand that the person will eventually return for pastoral care—they feel used.
Perhaps those feelings are wrong? Perhaps. But pastors are people, too. They’re not immune to emotions. While the small church pastor struggles to get by on a “pint-sized” income with no benefits, they know in their heart that the deserting member is supporting another pastor.
Serving God is not about money, but there should be family and love.
David Kinnaman, “New Research On the State of Discipleship,” Barna Group, https://www.barna.org/research/leaders-pastors/research-release/new-research-state-of- descipleship#.VqDcJFJQmDU.
What would you say if I told you that about 50% of millennials would answer, “No”?
A recent Barna article validated that “Almost half of Millennials (47%) agree at least somewhat that it is wrong to share one’s personal beliefs with someone of a different faith in hopes that they will one day share the same faith.”
So, what’s the deal? How could a believer of the gospel, no matter the age, think sharing the story of God is “wrong”?
Well, I think I know why, and I’d like to help.
The Blame Game
There’s a lot of murmuring about the millennial generation—some say they’re lazy, self-centered, and they’re an entitlement generation (i.e. everyone receives a participation trophy).
Two of my children are millennials. They were part of the entitlement “project.” But I don’t place the blame on them. Honestly, I don’t think blame for anything is productive or problem-solving, unless used for solutions.
If the millennial generation is any of the aforementioned attributes, could it be because they were taught. What I mean is—who handed out those trophies?
Likewise, when I read articles like Barna’s—articles about the Millennials and their faith—their lack of commitment—I ask again—who’s to blame?
Was it the children that dragged themselves to baseball, soccer, and football on Sunday mornings? I think you see where I’m going with this?
I think millennials get blamed for a lot. But I know my own children—they don’t fit that description. They’re hardworking, driven, and committed to their faith.
Maybe, just maybe, it’s our fault because we’ve taught them the wrong story?
The Western Story
The problem with much of Christianity is its draw into the Western story. Christianity has taken on the values and declared allegiance to its foreign neighbors of Western culture.
Greek tradition and philosophy have played a tremendous role throughout Western history. The current Western culture derived from a humanist ideology birthed during the Enlightenment—that human reason and intellect (what we call “science and fact”) are far superior than the Bible, which can only be believed by faith.
Newton employed mathematics in defining physics.Eventually, the Western story developed into man as relatively good, implementing immense reason and intellect to overcome negativity, disease, and poverty. Man becomes capable of creating an eschatological (end times) utopia where everyone and every form of love is accepted (accept God’s story).
Which leads us to one reasonwhy 47% Millennials believe it is wrong to share the gospel.
The Western story stands in great contrast from God’s story. Nevertheless, the Church marriedWestern humanism—refashioning the biblical metanarrative into short stories consisting of reasonings of literary genre, hermeneutical criticism, and theology.
But God’s story cannot be reduced to theology—as the biblical story is a comprehensive story about what it means to be truly human. It’s about being human as God designed, as He places us in the midst of His story that finds “its center in Jesus Christ.”
The hinge of Western culture finds its identity in human reason—Cogito, ergo sum— “I think, therefore I am.”
God’s story is not Western, it is an account of all of cosmic history—of the entirety of creation, nations, peoples and the purposeful design of the Creator, Redeemer, Sustainer, and Judge of the entire universe.
And the hinge of God’s story is the kingdom of God breaking through into God’s world. It is the birth, life, crucifixion, resurrection, ascension, and return of Jesus Christ.
If half of the Millennials think that sharing their Christian faith is wrong, it’s because they view Christianity as one ofmany religions—instead of the story.
The comprehensive story of God is not man’s escape from this world, but God’s victory within it. All humans are parts of God’s story, awaiting God’s triumphant return to renew and restore all things as they were designed.
As Newbigin elegantly writes, “Salvation means that man is released from bondage, and that the contradictions of which we have spoken are overcome…It means ‘wholeness.’ It means the healing of that which is wounded, the mending of that which is broken, the setting free of what is bound.”
God’s story—is about cosmic restoration centered in the work of Jesus Christ. The kingdom of God broke into this world to renew creation—one person at a time, sharing God’s story, until the King returns.
God’s story is not about the deliverance of man to escape the troubles of this world to enter into a heavenly paradise. God’s story is about what it truly means to be a person.
“The Bible tells a story that isthestory, the story of which all of human nature is a part.”
This means the Bible is not a book about condemnation—but God’s story. The Word of God is not telling the story about anotherreligion or faith, but how God has demonstrated great love and compassion to man.
The Scriptures are not about evangelism, but “an appeal of personal love which seeks not to coerce submission but to evoke love.”
The call of God— “Follow me” (Mk. 1:17) is a personal invitation from the brokenness of this world, to enter into God’s inviting and communal story of freedom, restoration, and Kingship.
“Almost Half of Practicing Christian Millennials Say Evangelism Is Wrong,” Barna.com, Faith & Christianity, Feb. 5, 2019.
Don’t get me wrong, literary genre, hermeneutics, and theology are a good thing, but if we’re too focused on criticisms and not the metanarrative, we miss the point. Michael Goheen, The Church and Its Vocation, 23.
Throughout God’s story, there have been many biblical “heroes.” Men and women of seemingly great renown—great courage and incredible resolve.
Men like David, warriors in battle, leading men to victory against insurmountable odds. Or women like Jael, an apparently ordinary wife with remarkable fortitude and bravery—launching a tent peg through the sleeping enemy (Judges 4:17–22).
Everyone loves stories. Especially stories about overcoming adversity—they’re the feel good, sort of chicken soup for the soul, stories.
When I reflect upon my life, I know my story. I know that it’s filled with defeats, trials, and sometimes, some wins. I also know that I’m not a hero. In fact, Jesus is the hero of my story. And, if I’m even more transparent, I’ve had way more failures in my life than victorious triumphs.
But as I’ve written before, Failing is Not Failure. When we learn from our failures and use them for success, those failures can become victories.
They Didn’t See That Coming
One of my recent devotional readings led me to Joshua and the battle of Ai (Josh. 7, 8). Joshua spies out Ai and organizes a small battalion of 3,000 Israelites to go up to battle against them. However, because of Israel’s hidden sin and idolatry, they flee in defeat.
The people of Israel didn’t see that coming! Their sin was revealed, but the people took action and repented. They refocused and centered their lives upon God.
Afterward, the Lord then encouraged Joshua, “Do not fear and do not be dismayed. Take all the fighting men with you, and arise, go up to Ai. See, I have given into your hand the king of Ai, and his people, his city, and his land.” This time, Joshua used defeat to bring victory.
As in the previous battle when the Israelites fled, Joshua engaged the city of Ai. Once again, the same troops, same battle plan (sort of), so battle looked like defeat.
Joshua had the men flee—but—only to draw the enemy out from the city and into the open. The plan worked.
Again, the people of Ai thought that they were routing the Israelites, but as soon as they were outside of the city, Joshua had his men sneak in and burn it to the ground!
The people of Ai didn’t see that coming! Joshua had the enemy surrounded—drawing them out into the open—there was nothing hidden and nowhere for the enemy to go.
Using Defeat for Victory
One thing that I have learned in life—when pride sets in it blurs my vision. Whenever I’m facing defeat, I have to ask probing questions: is there any hidden sin that I’m not seeing? Am I trying to do things in my power, or for my own glory? Am I trusting in God to be my “dreaded warrior”? How can I use this defeat for success? How can I honor and glorify God with my defeat? What have I learned?
Maybe I am building my empire and not God’s? Those are just some of the questions I think about. I also ask the Lord to “cleanse my heart,” to “search me and see if there are any wicked ways within me.”
When we confess our sins, our pride, and our motives, it brings the enemy into the open. Our adversary no longer has “ammunition” to use against us. To the enemy, on the outside, we may look the same, but internally, we have been renewed through repentance, probing, and reflection.
God is now able to use our defeat for victory. As Joshua used defeat for victory, we too can use our failures as springboards to victory. But, the central focus must not on us, but on the grace of God given through Jesus Christ.
What have you learned about your situations lately?